Doja Cat Offers Encouragement: ‘You’ve Never Pooped or Peed and Your Eyelashes Are Endlessly Long’

Doja Cat couldn’t help but tuck in nods to a pair of key bodily functions while playfully channeling the type of language often associated with spiritually minded social media personalities.

In a video shared to TikTok on Monday and reassuringly captioned “your breath smells fine, babe,” the Vie artist first launched into an earnest-seeming message of encouragement, complete with the usual “this video has found you for a reason” intro.

“Everything that I will say to you is the truth,” she said. “You are more beautiful than anyone on this planet has ever been. There has never been anyone like you. All your thoughts are original. Everything that you do creatively, every endeavor that you take upon, you master instantly. You’ve never made a mistake and no one else on the planet can have money because you have all of the money. You’re the perfect height, circumference, and width. Also, depth.”

From there, Doja, in her signature way, veered the message into new territory.

“You have no liquids inside of your body, as well,” she said. “You’ve never pooped or peed and your eyelashes are endlessly long. Don’t stop.”

Tuesday, Doja was named among the artists newly added to the performers lineup for next month’s MTV Video Music Awards ceremony hosted by LL Cool J. Per press notes, fans can expect a performance of “Jealous Type,” the recently released single off Vie, her follow-up to last year’s Scarlet-expanding Claude.

Ahead of the new album, Doja, fittingly, was included in Complex’s ranking of the 20 best rappers in their 20s right now. Her bow at No. 11 on the list came after Doja herself detailed the inherent ludicrousness of not including her in such conversations, noting earlier this month that she “didn’t grow up on the same flavor of rap” that some of her more vocal detractors may prefer.

“There are rappers who have strengths and weaknesses. I am one of them,” Doja said at the time.

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